the novelty has completely worn off of this job and from my current situation. this place is just shit evil and crooked and the part of humanity that sometimes makes me doubt whether the human species even deserves to exist at all.

i’ve learned all that i could ever want to learn about the seedy side (which is also the only side) of direct telemarketing sales and all i want to do now is come up with some sort of exit strategy. i’m sure that i have accrued more than enough material and information over the last three weeks to write a very long and compelling book on this experience.

the only problem is that i am still broke and i still work here.

in this morning’s 7:15 meeting we were told to never give up, to dig in, keep battling with our customers, and to keep asking for the money. we are expected either get these people’s credit card info and make a sale or force them to hang up on us cussing and swearing. there are no callbacks, no second chances, no exceptions. our job is to make a sale or to make these people that we are calling hate us.

how is this in any way a business model?

personally, i am done. i can’t do this anymore. i hate it with all of my heart and refuse to screw people over whether they are rude to me on the phone or not.

today’s one sliver lining was that the auto-dialers and leads were so messed up this morning that i sat for 5 hours straight (no exaggeration), had my dialer make over 1,000 phone calls and never once spoke to real person.

only in the last hour of my shift did i make any real human contact and have to make any pitches.

i spoke to three different people: an assistant college professor, an old woman and stoned mexican guy babysitting his kids. i let all of these people off the hook and didn’t “battle” with them or use any of the tricks i’ve been taught to keep them on the phone, make them feel bad about themselves and mindrape them into buying a product from me they may or may not need

i gave them the softest, most laidback pitches i could and when they told me that they’d have to think about it and call me back i said, “no problem,” and then let them hang up.

none of them ever called me back. and most likely none of them every will.

good. i’m glad. it means that i might still have a shot at someday having a soul.

this job gives me nightmares. it makes me irritable even when i’m miles away from it. and i don’t want to do it anymore.

i’m going to try to stick it out until day 30 just so i have a nice round number to on which to end these blog entries and this experience. like i’ve said before, i’m pretty sure i’m only a google search away from being fired, getting punched or worse. however, i will see this thing through to the best of my ability. but to be honest, all this can’t end soon enough and i’ll be thankful when it does. no matter what the circumstances.

here’s today’s twitter stream:

• In-house satellite radio is broke. Keeps changing stations every 7 secs: rap/rock/Christian/etc. Giving old guy 2 cubes away OCD metldown.
• Ok. Radio has stabilized and so has OCD guy. He’s currently singing alond to Coolio’s “Gangsta’s Paradise.” #allisrightwiththeworld
• Was just told “Hey, easy on the porno references” by a manager. Apparently bringing up Redtube.com is an unacceptable warming strategy.
• Nothing I say/type/write today is going to make any sense. I got less than 4 hours sleep & have been having nightmares about this job.
• Being here in real life is worse than the nightmares. No bed or pillow & I don’t have the option of masturbating to take my mind off of it.
• Old dude across the aisle from me is telling a long and elaborate story about a guy’s balls he saw back in high school 35 years ago.
• Did you know that there’s an XM Sirius station that plays rap songs from the 90’s that only white people liked? #digableplanets
• Just had a 78 yr old woman tell me she was “going to beat the fucking shit” out of her 81 year old husband for giving us their phone number.
• Old actor dude is telling the story about a movie he was in back in the 80’s. Egads, this fucking depressing. #glorydays #egads
• Co-worker just involuntarily bellowed “I want to go home” like a kid getting dropped of on his first day of kindergarten. #cryforhelp
• Co-worker is on his cellphone fighting w/ another telemarketing company who f-ed him over & is refusing to refund his $. Delicious. #karma
• A cholo stole my manager’s bobblehead last night at the Dodgers game. He’s furious about it. #thankyoucholosforhurtingthosewhohurtme
• I work with a bunch of choadfuckers. #describeyourworkmates